Альбом Nichole Nordeman

How many roads did I travel
before I walked down one that led me to You?
And how many dreams did unravel
before I believed in a hope that was true?
And how long? How far?
What was meant to fulfill only emptied me still
And all you ever wanted...

Only me, on my knees
Singing holy, holy
And somehow all that matters now is
You are holy, holy

How many deaths did I die
before I was awakened to new life again?
And how many half-truths did I bear witness to,
'til the proof was disproved in the end?
And how long? How far?
What was meant to illuminate, shadowed me still
And all you ever wanted...

Only me, on my knees
Singing holy, holy
And somehow all that matters now is
You are holy, holy

And all I have is gratitude to offer You

Holy, holy
Somehow all that matters now is you are holy

You are holy, holy
Somehow all that matters now is
You are holy, holy

Only me on my knees
Singing holy, holy
And somehow all that matters now is
You are holy, holy

Holy, holy, holy

Oooooo...
It's well past midnight
And I'm awake with questions that won't
Wait for daylight
Separating fact from my imaginary fiction
On this shelf of my conviction
I need to find a place
Where You and I come face to face
Thomas needed
Proof that You had really risen
Undefeated
When he placed his fingers
Where the nails once broke Your skin
Did his faith finally begin?
I've lied if I've denied
The common ground I've shared with him

And I, I really want to know You
I want to make each day
A different way that I can show You how
I really want to love You
Be patient with my doubt
I'm just tryin' to figure out Your will
And I really want to know You still

Nicodemus
Could not understand how You could
Truly free us
He struggled with the image
Of a grown man born again
We might have been good friends
Cuz sometimes I still question, too
How easily we come to You

But I, I really want to know You
I want to make each day
A different way that I can show You how
I really want to love You
Be patient with my doubt
I'm just tryin' to figure out Your will
And I really want to know You still

No more camping on the porch of indecision
No more sleeping under stars of apathy
And it might be easier to dream
But dreamin's not for me

And I, I really want to know You
I want to make each day
A different way that I can show You how
I really want to love You
Be patient with my doubt
I'm just tryin' to figure out Your will
And I really want to know You still

I want to know you, I really want to know you
Hey yeah, yeah
I really want to know you, I really want to know you,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Say goodnight to the light of the setting sun
One more day, one more way
Of keeping track of all I've done

I run this race, keep this pace
I'm doing fine
And I won't stop until each box
Gets checked a second time

And life becomes the round and round
Revolving door that won't slow down
It won't slow down

Do You wish, do You want us to breathe again?
Say goodbye to the lines that we've coloured in
Brown and grey from day to day
Do You cry, do You hope for all things made new?
Try and try to invoke us to live in You
That we might be the hands and feet of this mystery

This routine is nice and clean from dawn to dusk
I rise and rest, I do my best
When will it ever be enough?

And life becomes the bigger noise
Drowning out Your little voice
Your little voice, Jesus

Do You wish, do You want us to breathe again?
Say goodbye to the lines that we've coloured in
Brown and grey from day to day
Do You cry, do You hope for all things made new?
Try and try to invoke us to live in You
That we might be the hands and feet of this mystery

We take stock, and we punch the clock
And we make sure all those zeros have balanced in the end

Do You wish, do You want us to breathe again?
Say goodbye to the lines that we've coloured in
Brown and grey from day to day
Do You cry, do You hope for all things made new?
Try and try to invoke us to live in You
That we might be the hands and feet of this mystery

Every evening sky, an invitation
To trace the patterned stars
And early in July, a celebration
For freedom that is ours
And I notice You
In children's games
In those who watch them from the shade
Every drop of sun is full of fun and wonder
You are summer

And even when the trees have just surrendered
To the harvest time
Forfeiting their leaves in late September
And sending us inside
Still I notice You when change begins
And I am braced for colder winds
I will offer thanks for what has been and what's to come
You are autumn

And everything in time and under heaven
Finally falls asleep
Wrapped in blankets white, all creation
Shivers underneath
And still I notice you
When branches crack
And in my breath on frosted glass
Even now in death, You open doors for life to enter
You are winter

And everything that's new has bravely surfaced
Teaching us to breathe
What was frozen through is newly purposed
Turning all things green
So it is with You
And how You make me new
With every season's change
And so it will be
As You are re-creating me
Summer, autumn, winter, spring

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(Nichole Nordeman, Jay Joyce)

The gate is wide
The road is paved in moderation
The crowd is kind and quick to pull you in
Welcome to the middle ground
You're safe and sound and
Until now, it's where I've been

'Cause it's been fear that ties me down to everything
But it's been love, your love, that cuts the strings
So long status quo
I think I just let go
You make me want to be brave
The way it always was
Is no longer good enough
You make me want to be brave
Brave, brave

I am small
And I speak when I'm spoken to
But I am willing to risk it all
I say your name
Just your name and I'm ready to jump
Even ready to fall…
Why did I take this vow of compromise?
Why did I try to keep it all inside?

I've never known a fire that didn't begin with a flame
Every storm will start with just a drop of rain
But if you believe in me, that changes everything

I don't mind if you've got something nice to say about me
And I enjoy an accolade like the rest
And you can take my picture and hang it in a gallery
Of all the "who's who's" and so-and-so's
That used to be the best at such and such
It wouldn't matter much

I won't lie, it feels alright to see your name in lights
We all need an "atta boy" or "atta girl"
But in the end I'd like to hang my hat on more besides
The temporary trappings of this world

I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love?
Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace
Who blessed Your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy

I don't have to look too far or too long awhile
To make a lengthy list of all that I enjoy
It's an accumulating trinket and a treasure pile
Where moth and rust, thieves and such will soon
enough destroy

I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love?
Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace
Who blessed Your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy

Not well-traveled, not well-read
Not well-to-do, or well-bred
I just want to hear instead
Well done, good and faithful one

I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love?
Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace
Who blessed Your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy

I don't mind if you've got something nice to say about me

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Is it any wonder
That she would feel less than real
When she reveals what is clearer
In her mirror

Take a look around her
Magazines, glamour queens
Waist-line dreams in her diary
So inspiring

Nobody told her that little girls
Don't have to have the softest curls for love

So whatever's left inside her
Is gonna smile wider, shine brighter
Until she gets pulled under
Is it any wonder?

Is it any wonder
That he's obsessed with what is best
And nothing less... he's a hero
With six zeros

Take a look around him
His wallet size and what he drives
Will symbolise how he's made it
How they'll grade it

Nobody told him that little boys
Don't have to have the fastest toys to win

So whatever's left inside him
Is gonna keep on tryin' to keep on buyin'
Until he gets pulled under
Is it any wonder?

Will somebody tell her there's a love that can't be glamourized
Tell him there's a hope that won't be downsized
Someone tell them that the billboards lie
All the time

Cos whatever's left inside her
Is gonna smile wider
And whatever's left inside him
Is gonna keep on tryin'
Until they get pulled under
Is it any wonder?

Pencil marks on a wall, I wasn't always this tall
You scattered some monsters from beneath my bed
You watched my team win
You watched my team lose
Watched when my bicycle went down again
And when I was weak, unable to speak
Still I could call You by name
And I said, Elbow Healer, Superhero
Come if You can
You said, I Am

Only sixteen, life is so mean
What kind of curfew is at 10pm?
You saw my mistakes
And watched my heart break
Heard when I swore I'd never love again
And when I was weak, unable to speak
Still I could call You by name
And I said Heartache Healer, Secret Keeper
Be my best friend
And you said, I Am

You saw me wear white by pale candlelight
I said forever to what lies ahead
Two kids and a dream, with kids that can scream
Too much it might seem when it is 2am
And when I am weak, unable to speak
Still I will call You by name
Shepherd, Savior, Pasture Maker
Hold onto my hand
You say, I Am

The winds of change and circumstance blow in and all around us
So we find a foothold that's familiar
And bless the moments that we feel You nearer

When life had begun, I was woven and spun
You let the angels dance around the throne
And who can say when, but they'll dance again
When I am free and finally headed home
I will be weak, unable to speak
Still I will call You by name
Creator, Maker, Life Sustainer
Comforter, Healer, my Redeemer
Lord and King, Beginning and the End

I Am
Yes, I Am

(Nichole Nordeman)

What if you're right?
And he was just another nice guy
What if you're right?
What if it's true?
They say the cross will only make a fool of you
And what if it's true?

What if he takes his place in history
With all the prophets and the kings
Who taught us love and came in peace
But then the story ends
What then?

But what if you're wrong?
What if there's more?
What if there's hope you never dreamed of hoping for?
What if you jump?
And just close your eyes?
What if the arms that catch you, catch you by surprise?
What if He's more than enough?
What if it's love?

What if you dig
Way down deeper than your simple-minded friends
What if you dig?
What if you find
A thousand more unanswered questions down inside
That's all you find?

What if you pick apart the logic
And begin to poke the holes
What if the crown of thorns is no more
Than folklore that must be told and retold?

You've been running as fast as you can
You've been looking for a place you can land for so long
But what if you're wrong?

There are times when faith and common sense do not align,
when hard core evidence of you is hard to find,
and I am silenced in the face of argumenative debate, and
it's a long hill it's a lonely climb. Cause they want proof,
They want proof of all these mysteries I claim. Cause only
fools would want to chant a dead man's name.
Maybe it's true, yeah but....

Chorus:

I would be a fool for You, all because You asked me to.
A simpleton who's seemingly naive,
I do believe, You came and made Yourself a fool for me.

I admit that in my darkest hours I've asked what if,
What if we created some kind of man made faith like this,
Out of good intention or emotional invention,
and after life is through there will be no You.
Cause they want proof of all these miracles I claim,
Cause only fools believe that men can walk on waves.
Maybe it's true, yeah but...

(Repeat Chorus)

Unaware of popularity,
and unconcerned with dignity,
You made me free.
That's proof enough for me.

(music break)

I would be a fool for You(fool for you)
Only if You asked me to,
A simpleton who's only thinkin' of
your cause of love.

I will speak Jesus' name(fool for you).
If that makes me crazy,
they can call me crazed,
I'm happy to be seemingly naive,
I do believe, You came and made Yourself a fool for me.

(music break)

A fool for you.

It's a fear that keeps me wide awake
In the middle of the night
When the expectations are too great
And the bar gets raised too high
So I do the best with what I've got
And hope that no one knows
That I strain to see how high I can
Try to stand on these toes
Until I'm measured, but You know better

So, thank You, Jesus
Even when You see us just as we are
Fragile and frail and so far
From who we want to be
So, thank You, Jesus
Even when the pieces are broken and small
Dreams shatter and scatter like the wind
Thank You, even then

So I put aside the masquerade
And admit that I am not okay
Which may not be the thing to say
But I'm not ashamed to need You more each day

So, thank You, Jesus
Even when You see us just as we are
Fragile and frail and so far
From who we want to be
So, thank You, Jesus
Even when the pieces are broken and small
Dreams shatter and scatter like the wind
Thank You, even then

We raise the standard and try to reach You
But we'll never make it and we don't need to ...

So, thank You, Jesus
Even when You see us just as we are
Fragile and frail and so far
From who we want to be
So, thank You, Jesus
Even when the pieces are broken and small
Dreams shatter and scatter like the wind
Thank You, even then

We rode into town the other day,
just me and my daddy.
he said I'd finally reached that age,
and I could ride next to him on a horse
that of course, was not quite as wild.

We heard a crowd of people shouting,
and so we stopped to find out why.
There was that man that my dad said he loved,
but today there was fear in his eyes.

So I said, “Daddy, why are they screaming?
Why are the faces of some of them beaming?
Why is He dressed in that bright purple robe?
I bet that crown hurts Him more than He shows.
Daddy please, can't you do something?
He looks as though He's gonna cry.
You said He was stronger than all of those guys;
Daddy, please tell me why.
Why does everyone want Him to die?”

Later that day, the sky grew cloudy,
and Daddy said I should go inside.
Somehow he knew things would get stormy.
Boy was he right, but I could not keep from wondering
if there was something he had to hide.

So after he left, I had to find out.
I was not afraid of getting lost.
So I followed the crowds to a hill
where I knew men had been killed,
and I heard a voice come from the cross.

And it said, “Father, why are they screaming?
Why are the faces of some of them beaming?
Why are they casting their lots for my robe?
This crown of thorns hurts me more than it shows.
Father please, can't you do something?
I know that You must hear my cry.
I thought I could handle a cross of this size.
Father, remind me why.
Why does everyone want me to die?
Oh, when will I understand why?”

My precious son, I hear them screaming.
I'm watching the face of the enemy beaming.
But soon I will clothe you in robes of my own.
Jesus, this hurts me much more than you know,
but this dark hour, I must do nothing,
though I've heard your unbearable cry.
The power in your blood destroys all of the lies;
soon you'll see past their unmerciful eyes.
Look, there below, see the child
trembling by her father's side.
Now I can tell you why...
she is why you must die.

(Nichole Nordeman, Jill Tomalty, Jay Joyce)

Every time I try to find you
Every road comes back around
Just another hoop to jump through
Another mile of covered ground

I am weary of the answers
More theory and cliché
They raise the letter of the law like a banner
'Til you're small and far away

All the questions in my head
Are from my heart instead

Be real to me now
That's all I'm asking
Be real to me now

Every scribe and every scholar
No winners in this debate
Everybody seems to stand up taller
When you're easy to explain

I don't need to know what I don't know
Just got to let it go

Be real to me now
That's all I'm asking
Be real somehow
More than anything
More than anything

So lay down the sword
And put away the doctrine
Love a little more, love a little more
'Cause everybody's broken

I was certain that I knew You
At the tender age of twelve
You'd so often been described by those
Who said they knew You well
Dark and rugged in Your thirties
With a smile as bright as Your robe

Every teacher, every preacher
With the very best intent
Found new ways to hide the mystery
Replaced by common sense
And to know You was to keep You in my pocket
So easy to hold

I know I can't explain You
I would not even try to
And yet it's clear that You are here beside me
I marvel and I wonder
So near and somehow still so far
What makes You who You are?

It is easy to insist
On what is packaged and precise
And dismiss the clear suspicion
That You're bigger than we'd like
It is tempting to regard You as familiar
In so many ways

I've tried to draw these lines around You
A definition or an absolute
But I could not be satisfied with black or white
There is so much more
There is so much You

Rolling River God
Little Stones are smooth
Only once the water passes through
So I am a stone
rough and grainy still
Trying to reconcile this river's chill

Chorus
But when I close my eyes
and feel you rushing by
I know that time brings change
and change takes time
And when the sunset comes
my prayer would be this one
that you might pick me up
and notice that I am
just a little smoother in your hand

Sometimes raging wild
sometimes swollen high
never have I known this river dry
The deepest part of you
is where I want to stay
and feel the sharpest edges wash away

Chorus
And when I close my eyes
and feel you rushing by
I know that time brings change
and change takes time
And when the sunset comes
my prayer would be just this one
that you might pick me up
and notice that I am
just a little smoother in your hand