So you think you've got troubles,
The more you try the worse you get
So you think the world don't like you
Well, brother, you ain't heard nothin yet
My car sounds like an old tin can
My wife ran off with another man
I sprained a muscle in my fishin hand
And my income tax is due
I lost my money in a poker game
I think my left leg is goin lame
My brother asked me to change my name
And I guess thats what i'll do
(chorus)
So you think you've got troubles,
The more you try the worse you get
So you think the world don't like you
Well, brother, you ain't heard nothin yet
My doctor told me not to smoke
Drink nothin stronger than a coke
Shouldn't even listen to a dirty joke
'Cause i'll laugh and strain my heart
I've had every ailment known to man
From african mumps to dishpan hands
I lost every race that I ever ran
I never even got to start
(chorus)
So you think you've got troubles,
The more you try the worse you get
So you think the world don't like you
Well, brother, you ain't heard nothin yet
Now some people call me a pessimist
They say I oughta make the best of this
Well maybe I am a pessimist
Thats something I wouldn't know,
But something I do know, I'll tell you right now
I'm milkin the wrong end of this old cow
There's too many wrinkles in this boy's brow
And this stuff has got to go.
(chorus)
So you think you've got troubles,
The more you try the worse you get
So you think the world don't like you
Well, brother, you ain't heard nothin yet
Gonna put a bar in the back of my car and drive myself to drink.
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