The Vandals
"Change The World With My Hockey Stick"

Gonna change the world
With my hockey stick
Gonna make a real difference
Feed the poor and heal the sick

I'll practice in my yard
Or in the showers every day
Until I get so goddamn good
That someone really super rich will say
"Here's a million dollars
You can spend it how you like,
You can change the fucking world
Or turn it into something nice"
I'll use my stick for foreign matters
Giving meaning to our planet
And anything we ever wanted
We will get to have it
And it's all thanks to my hockey stick
And skill in which I use it
A hero to humanity
I swear I won't abuse it

I'll change the world
I'll make a difference man
I'll change the world with my hockey stick
Solving all our problems…

Like crack and aids and murder, violence, syphilis…
Global warming, floods and arson, rape, and birth defects
And things affecting ever person
War on crime and racism are problems of the past you see
Thanks to the greatest hockey player
That would be me
World leaders are united
From the joy to watch me playing
As the planet gathers ‘round
For the chance to hear me saying
"This place is now utopia
And heaven is on earth"
Me and my hockey stick
Can finally built this earth

I changed the world
I made a difference!
I changed the world with my hockey stick
I changed the world
Yeah!
I changed the world with my hockey stick
I solved all our problems

People don't appreciate the glory I have brought them
I saved this planet in its darkest hour
So they will grovel beneath the man that saved them from the curse
Appoint myself ruler of the universe

And lots of family masses they will grovel at my feet
And their lives will serve no purpose
Other than to honor me
And this stick it will now rule their lives
And dictate all their thoughts
And I'll re-write our history
And thus reside as God

I'll rule the world
I did it!
I'll rule the world with my hockey stick
I'll rule the world
Yeah!
I'll rule the world with my hockey stick
Just because I am that good