John Cooper Clarke
"Gaberdine Angus"
Gaberdine Angus at the magazine rack
Views the situation from the front to the back
Nobody's looking for the man with the mac
Stick it right back in the stack jack
Gaberdine Angus had a mean trick
Had a mean wang - made women sick
Here's one now - go on act the goat
Gaberdine Angus - open your coat
Why waste words - risk resistance
When you can climax from a distance
Shock tactics - designed to stun
Gaberdine Angus - it isn't done
She don't run - she don't scream
Your pink extremity has gone unseen
She doesn't give the usual nervous cough
So zip up Angus - then zip off.